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how to quiet your mind

How To Quiet Your Mind Without Meditation or Techniques

Although you arrived here wondering how to quiet your mind, I will talk less about the “how-to” and direct you more toward that which you already know how to do. Don’t get me wrong, meditation and certain techniques are great, but what if you didn’t need a strategy every time you wanted to quiet your mind? What if all you need to know is how the mind really works?

Meditation Works But…

I meditate every morning for 15-20 minutes (30 minutes if you include Yoga), so I’m all for meditation as part of a daily routine. Meditation does help to quiet the mind, however, I don’t meditate with a goal to quiet the mind. I meditate to connect with my highest self, with the universe.

Meditating every morning over the past 18 months has taught me a lot about how the mind really works. One thing I learned is that I don’t want to have to meditate every time I want to quiet a noisy mind. If I’m driving and my mind won’t shut up, I don’t think to start a meditation, nor do I want to pull over to practice meditation in hopes of quieting my noisy mind.

All I want is to continue driving while enjoying a little more peace.

I’m sure you can also think of many situations where it is not conducive to initiate a meditation practice. You need something simpler and more practical.

What About NLP Techniques?

Similar to meditation, NLP techniques can be effective for quieting the mind. NLP focuses heavily on manipulating the mind into receiving the desired result.

One of the techniques NLP teaches us to use is to treat our mind like a movie playing within a movie theatre. We can then manipulate the colours, maybe brighten or dim them, maybe change it to greyscale.

Then we have the sound of the movie. We can change the voices to sound like a munchkin, or maybe your favourite cartoon character. The characteristic of the movie that will be most appealing when trying to quiet your mind is the volume. We can increase the volume or decrease the volume.

It does work, but I find it only works for a very short period of time. Those booming thoughts want to be heard. So what happens, the volume seems to uncontrollably start ramping itself back up without our permission

You Already Know How To Quiet Your Mind

(you just didn’t think it could be this simple)

Have you ever been to a concert or a party and held a conversation with the person next to you, despite the booming base?

Have you ever been driving while completely tuning out the song on the radio in order to listen to the thoughts in your head?

Have you ever been driving while being completely immersed in thought only to hear your favourite song come on so you decide to tune out those thoughts and listen to your song?

Have you ever been hard at work while your co-worker is telling you a story you could give two shits about so you decide not to hear a word they say and focus on your work?

What were you able to do in each of those situations?

You were able to tune out what you didn’t want to listen to, what you didn’t want to pay attention to.

Imagine…

Imagine your mind as the booming bass.

Imagine your mind as the song on the radio.

Imagine your mind as the words of your co-worker.

You don’t have to listen to your mind just because it’s your mind. If it has nothing appealing to say at the moment then tune it out, stop paying attention to it.

It’s only the thoughts we pay attention to that make noise.

Use your free will and choose the thoughts you actually want to pay attention to.

We’ve all been born with the innate ability to choose our thoughts. We don’t choose which thoughts pop into our head but we do get to choose which ones we pay attention to. Choose to give attention to the thoughts that serve you and practice tuning out the rest.

This is where meditation can become useful. Having a daily meditation practice can help you practice tuning out your thoughts.

You’ll Never Stop Thinking So Don’t Get Your Hopes Up

When many people are on the search for how to quiet their mind they seem to be searching for a remedy to stop thought completely. I hate to be the bearer of bad news, this will never happen.

Even the greatest Monks and Eastern spiritual Gurus will never stop their minds from thinking. What they are good at is tuning out their mind at will. Tuning out does have a settling effect in the mind so your thoughts will become clearer and more spacious.

The mind works like a radio that doesn’t have an off button, since you can’t turn it off you just have to learn to tune in when you want to listen and tune out when you don’t.

And remember, you know how to do it, don’t make it more complicated than it is.

30 days of meditation review

Short Review On My First 30 Days Of Meditation

30 Day Meditation Review

MEDITATION HAS CHANGED MY LIFE!

I am excited to say that I have completed my first 30 days of meditation, without missing a day! Saying that meditation has changed my life is not an exaggeration, no other habit that I have adopted in the past has even come close to the positive impact meditation has had on my life.

I am, by no means, a meditation expert, quite the opposite actually. I am a beginner, with much to learn. Please keep that in mind as you read the rest of the review. I am not advocating anything I have learned to be the best way or the only way to do things, it is what I have found to work best for me.

Insight timer – my source for guided meditations

Insight Timer is the best meditation app available for your phone or tablet, hands down. Its’ only competition comes from 2 other apps: Headspace and Calm. Both of these apps offer a free option, which is EXTREMELY LIMITED on both apps. To really take full advantage of each app you will need to pay.

At the time of writing this review, Insight Timer has 4695 free meditations.

My Daily Gratitude Meditation Routine

Why did I make a commitment to daily gratitude?

I made a commitment to a daily morning gratitude meditation, as I had a bad habit of taking things for granted.

What was I hoping to gain from this?

I was hoping to gain a greater appreciation and sense of gratitude for all that’s part of my life, including the small things I typically overlook or take for granted, and the perceived negatives in my life.

Did I gain what I hoped I would?

I can confidently say yes. Not 100% and I did not expect a complete overhaul in 30 days, I did notice a remarkable difference in appreciating the little things much more often.

Every morning, the first thing I am thankful for, without fail, is being alive that day. The second thing I am thankful for every morning, without fail, is that Allie is alive that day. I do not force these thoughts, I let them come to me naturally, and they are always the first 2 thoughts in my head to be grateful for.

This daily gratitude influenced me to appreciate each day as it was, without wanting to live in the past or the future.

The 3 Gratitude Meditations I Resonated Most With (All From Insight Timer):

In order from most favourite to least.

  1. Peaceful and Relaxed: Gratitude Meditation by Melissa Dormoy
    A perfectly blended combination on mindfulness, gratitude, and self-empowering visualization. The visualization is what I like best about this meditation, it really sets the tone for my day. There is a good amount of silence to allow for reflection.
  2. Morning Ritual by The Meditation House
    A blended combination of mindfulness, gratitude, and intentions for the day. This is a great meditation if you woke up on the wrong side of the bed.
  3. Gratitude Reflection by Tony Brady
    A blended combination of mindfulness and gratitude. Not much silence, and much more emphasis on gratitude leaving much less time for reflection.

My Daily Evening Meditation

I did not have a set plan for my evening meditation. Below are the 3 different meditation series I used.

The 3 Evening Meditations I Used (All From Insight Timer):

In order from most favourite to least.

  1. Surrender by Michelle Zarrin
    This was a 15-day series that started with 11 minutes of meditation and ended at 25 minutes. I had my breakthrough on the 15th day of this series, in which I outline in my post Day 26. I really enjoyed the progressive amount of silence as the days went on. Her voice is extremely soothing. I will definitely be using Day 15 of her series in the future.
  2. Gratitude by Michelle Zarrin
    This was a 10-day series that started with 11 minutes of meditation and ends with 20 minutes. I was only on day 4 by my 30th day of meditation, as this was the last of the 3 meditations I started. A fantastic approach to gratitude. Each day brings a new aspect of life to focus gratitude towards. This can bring plenty of emotions up if you are not experienced with much meditation, or are someone who avoids their emotions or hardships.
  3. Seated Mindfulness by Palouse Mindfulness
    This was a basic mindfulness meditation, done seated, great for beginners. I am very glad I started with this before moving into the other 2 meditations. I got frustrated numerous times during these meditations, so I couldn’t imagine meditating to Michelle Zarrin’s meditations without experiencing this one first. I learned the basics of being aware of thoughts and being non-judging towards them, very grateful for that.

The Progress Of My Meditation Quality

I distinctly remember experiencing much frustration and anxiousness during the first couple of weeks of consistent meditation. This gradually subsided over the last 2 weeks, progressing to my best day of the entire 30 days on Day 26.

If I were to rate my quality on a scale of 1-10 from Day 1 to Day 30, it would be a quality of 1 on Day 1 and a quality of 7 by Day 30.

What I learned about my meditation practice

My number one takeaway from these first 30 days was not to try and force my mind to go where I want it to. Once I learned to let it be, as is, with awareness, my meditation went to another level.

Forcing myself to try and think about nothing led to a continuous cycle of overthinking about nothing. Thinking about not thinking, how ironic. I have heard many times to be the watcher of your thoughts, be aware of your thoughts, WITHOUT JUDGEMENT. Let them come and go, without immersing yourself in them. Easier said than done that’s for sure.

What else I learned:

  • Consistency is key
  • Meditating while I am fatigued is not very effective, although any meditation IS better than no meditation

How meditation has changed me over the past 30 Days

  • I only reached a point of “anger” or “frustration” once over the past 30 days
  • I am much more grateful for being alive
  • I am more grateful for the people who truly care about me
  • I am exponentially more aware of my thoughts and emotions, and where they came from
  • My thoughts have much more clarity
  • I have learned what being aware of being aware really feels like, and what it means
  • I am much less emotionally driven
  • I can make much more sense of the emotions I feel
  • I had powerful thoughts come to me that I truly do not feel would have come to me otherwise
  • I feel more at one with the world
  • I feel much more serene on a daily
  • I am much less forgetful, and am aware of living in the moment more often
  • I experience much less conflict with my ego, and making decisions more intuitively
  • I used to think our cat is annoying, I’d get really frustrated when she would meow at midnight until the cows come home. I would neglect her and rarely express love for her because of this. Now, I actually feel much love for her. I feel a bond, a sure sign that I am becoming love with the universe.

Wow! Not so short after all! 1200 words later…I got a little carried away it seems. I didn’t want to leave anything out, so if you made it this far, thanks for reading my “short” review on my first 30 days of meditation, and I truly hope you enjoyed it.

What is your experience with meditation?

30 days of meditation review

About My 365 Meditation Journey And Why I Am Doing This

I was ignorant toward meditation

If you had asked me not too far in my distant past what I thought about meditation I would have been ignorant towards it. I would have associated it with religion, and the original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie, when the four Ninja Turtles are meditating around the fire, and they started communicating with the spirit of Splinter, their master. Meditation appeared to be some hocus-pocus, mumbo-jumbo, that I thought only the weirdest of human beings practiced.

My paradigm shift – Dying To Be Me

I have had a significant paradigm shift since then. The shift happened in late 2016 after reading Anita Moorjani’s incredible book called Dying To Be Me. For those who are unaware, Anita clinically died from Lymphoma, went to another realm, had an out-of-body experience, had a choice whether to stay in the other realm or come back to earth.

She talks about her new perspective on life in the 2nd half of the book, which is the most fascinating perspective on life that I had ever heard from anyone, I didn’t know the world could be seen that way. It sparked something inside of me.

Since then, I have been on a keen path to developing a similar perspective on life as Anita. I knew this wasn’t going to be easy. There are many more paradigm shifts that will need to happen, I will need to let go of long-held beliefs and emotional baggage. One thing she mentioned quite a bit was being present, at the moment, connected to the universe, and being love.

Reading this book helped me realize how mindless I was being

As I reflected on my own life throughout the book, I came to realize that I lived most of my life in either the past or the future. Constantly thinking, mindlessly, about past events, stirring up old emotions, or trying to predict the future, creating emotions around events that haven’t even happened yet. I was living like the majority of people in this world, not really living, but mindlessly doing. I wanted to start being, not doing.

Signs that you are not living mindfully, in the present moment:

  • forgetfulness
  • irritation/frustration
  • daydreaming
  • rushing your meals
  • road rage
  • poor decision making
  • not acknowledging your 5 senses
  • poor listening habits
  • automated responses to people

Being aware of being aware?

One of the first steps on my journey to oneness, a universal connection, was having a strong ability to become present in the NOW, this present moment. This goal brought me to my next 2 books: The Power of NOW by Eckhart Tolle and Mindfulness For Beginners by John Kabat-Zinn. The big takeaway from reading these 2 great books was that

immersive thoughts cannot exist if you are in the NOW.

Thoughts can exist, but instead of immersing in those thoughts, it is simply being aware that those thoughts exist, and being aware that you are being aware. This was a huge paradigm shift for me.

Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) – A New Beginning For Me

After reading John Kabat-Zinn’s book on Mindfulness For Beginners, my interest peaked on the subject of mindfulness-based stress reduction. It resonated with me, it was exactly what I wanted, without previously knowing what I wanted, specifically. After some research, I discovered the Palouse Mindfulness, an MBSR 8 weeks certificate course. The best part about this course…it’s FREE! This course was my first introduction to meditation. I have been meditating fairly consistently over the past month, however, it hasn’t been every day.

The Best Meditation App – Insight Timer (get it!)

This app was brought to my attention by one of my clients. It is an amazing app for meditating, whether you are a beginner or a seasoned veteran. With over 4000 meditations to choose from, guided and unguided, you will find meditations that resonate with you. The app builds a portfolio of statistics on your profile to help with your accountability and gives you great insight into many facets of your meditation practice. The best part…it`s FREE! Feel free to add me as a friend, search Rob Kish.

5 Main Reasons I Am Pursuing This Journey

  1. Enhance Emotional Intelligence
  2. Create Self-Fulfillment
  3. Manifest My Life Purpose
  4. Discover My Human And Spiritual Potential
  5. Create My Own Perspective On My Reality (without external influence)

I have developed a strong desire to seek my maximum human potential as the creator of my own destiny. I know, deep down inside, my intuition is telling me, that this is a big part of my journey, that I will not meet my potential without it. I WILL become the best of me, for myself, my wife, and all those I have chosen to be in my life!

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