Why Positive Thinking Doesn’t Work: And What Does

Why Positive Thinking Doesn’t Work: And What Does

You might be anxiously wondering where this article is going to go, so just in case you’re about to judge me as some negative Nancy that’s going to bash positive thinking, I’d like to clear that up because that’s not what I’m about to do.

I’m going to use a deep dive into The Three Principles understanding of Mind, Consciousness, and Thought to awaken you to the fact that we don’t need to try to think positive in order to enjoy a joyous and fulfilling life. All we need is an understanding, and to not take our thoughts so damn seriously.

What I’m going to touch on is:

  • Positive and negative thoughts don’t exist, you just think they do
  • Judging vs understanding
  • A fear-based mentality
  • How the mind really works
  • Where our thoughts actually come from
  • What control we really have
  • The repercussions to always trying to think positive
  • How positive thinking teaches us to become more judgmental
  • A more peaceful approach to our thoughts and emotions
  • A healthier way to know your thinking is off
  • Where is freedom of mind?

By trying to think positive all the time, you’re attempting to shun the negative and embrace the positive instead of embracing the whole.

The self-help industry is completely flooded with the newest tips and strategies on how to think more positive more often. Oddly enough, attempting to see through a rose coloured lens all the time isn’t the solution to living a more fulfilling and joyful life. On top of that, it doesn’t even work.

My goal by the end of this post is to encourage you to meet your thoughts with understanding and compassion oppose to judgement. True success would be seeing the judgement of your thoughts as laughable.

Positive Thinking Failed Me

Being a caregiver to my wife with Leukemia for the past 9 years has taught me a lot. I’ve been to hell on earth and back, all in one lifetime, and I’m very grateful for this experience. Amongst the blessings in disguise that I’ve uncovered, I’ve learnt not to fear my own thinking.

During my deepest depths of despair, the world was a very, very dark place and I couldn’t see the light for the life of me. I tried so hard to “think positive”, but I wasn’t thrown a single bone to chew on.

I wanted to think positive because I was so afraid of what was going on inside my head. I was more afraid of my own thoughts than I was of cancer. I was constantly on edge, waiting to defend against the next negative thought that popped up.

When I needed positive thoughts the most they weren’t there. Or maybe they were, maybe I was blind to them because I was so distracted by all the attention I was giving to my “negative thinking”? Hmm

Suffice to say, I ground through that stage in my journey, it was not a graceful victory by any stretch.

I know with all my being that I will never go back to that place, or anywhere near it. I know this because I no longer judge my thinking as positive or negative. What’s probably even more important is that I no longer fear my own thoughts.

I now aim to meet each of my thoughts with love and compassion. Love trumps fear every single time. This compassion eliminates any desire for me to judge or change my thinking.

All of my thoughts are now arbitrary until I decide which ones will best serve me and the greater good.

Positive And Negative Thoughts Don’t Exist, You Just Think They Do

We make up what every single one of our thoughts mean. There is no universal meaning to our thoughts. There are universal feelings that we label, but each of those feelings means something different to each of us because we each have different thoughts that lead to those feelings.

Any given thought that you THINK is positive or negative is only that way because you THINK it is. You have labelled it so. Why do thoughts that lead to feeling happy have to be positive and thoughts that lead to feeling sad have to be negative?

Is it really such a negative thing to have thoughts that lead to feeling sad if you lose someone you loved dearly? Would you rather feel happy you lost them? One could argue that being happy in such a circumstance could be labelled as negative. It’s all a matter of perspective.

Judging vs Understanding

Judging leads us towards separating our thoughts into positive or negative compartments.

Understanding points toward the fact that we think. Through a simple understanding that we are thinking creatures and we aren’t in control, regardless of the content of our thinking, we can finally sit back and just watch the movie play out in our head.

Knowing that our thoughts have no life of their own allows us to not have to take them so seriously. None of our thoughts are real, not one. They only appear real because we give certain thoughts our full attention. This attention breathes life into a thought and that’s when they appear REAL.

Well, here’s the best news…

just because you have a thought in your head, this does not mean you have to act on it nor do you have to believe it. After all, it’s just a thought…until you think it’s not.

When we give our thoughts a life of their own, we feel the need to gain some control by attempting to banish the bad and embrace the good. We do this because we fear our thoughts are real, they have a sense of control over us, so we must take back control before they make us act out in ways we forbid.

How Positive Thinking Teaches Us To Become More Judgmental

In order to distinguish the so-called positive and negative thoughts, we must judge them as one or the other. To be on the look-out for the bad guys all day (negative thoughts), this requires us to be judging our thoughts all day.

This teaches us to analyze our thinking, then segmenting each thought into positive or negative categories. I’m exhausted just thinking about doing this each day.

We don’t see the world as our experience, we experience our thoughts as the world we see.

Therefore, the more we judge ourselves, which includes the thoughts in our head, the more we judge the world outside of us, including others. This is not the way of a more peaceful and joyful life.

As soon as we judge a thought as negative we’ve given it life, quite the opposite of our intentions. If we don’t judge the thought, it passes by all on its’ own like a cloud in the sky. Letting the thought go with judgement allows room for the next thought to pass by.

If we hold our attention on a negative thought, it leaves no room for the next thought to come through, not until we let that one go.

Being able to see your thoughts without judgement is ultimately what brings peace. Trying to think positive all the time takes you further away from this and more woven into a neurotic and judgmental world.

A Fear-Based Mentality

When we see our thoughts as real and in control of us, we have a tendency to then fear the thoughts we’ve judged as negative. This fear of a negative thought gives birth to the desire to abolish negative thinking while simultaneously attempting to control our thoughts.

If we take the stance of seeing all of our thoughts as arbitrary, until we give them life through belief and attention, we won’t feel the need to judge our thinking or try and control the uncontrollable. A thought becomes a thought, no more and no less.

In this non-judgmental state, we develop compassion for our thoughts, regardless of the contents. This compassion breeds a whole new level of understanding that makes one wonder why they felt the need to judge, fear, or change their thoughts in the first place.

How The Mind Really Works

The mind works like a projector. It reflects our own thoughts back to us and we call what we see “reality”. We’re watching the movie of our own mind, we’re not the movie, and therefore we’re not our thoughts.

Sure, we can direct the film through editing the speed, colour, and sound, but what we cannot do is create the film. We don’t even have control over which film gets placed into the projector.

Where Our Thoughts Actually Come From

This remains a mystery. This mystery is what religion, mystics, and spiritual leaders try to put into words that which cannot be described with words.

What we do know is that we don’t create our thoughts, we receive them and we observe them. Similarly to how we listen to a radio, and if we don’t control what is on the radio, what control do we have?

What Control We Really Have

You’re driving along, listening to the radio, you’re favourite song has just ended, the next one comes on. It’s a song that has been so overplayed; you’ve heard it way too many times recently. What do you do? Change the station.

The next station plays a song that reminds you of your ex…neeeeext. The station after is playing a song that has always had this negative vibe to it…next.

After flicking through the stations, you find one of your favourite songs, a song that energizes you every time you hear it. Finally! So you decide to stay at this station for the rest of the song, then the cycle repeats itself.

We don’t have the power to decide what plays on the radio, but we do have control over which station we decide to listen to.

This is kind of how our minds work. Our brain is like a radio in the sense that it’s a receiver. It receives thoughts from an unknown source of intelligence.

We don’t have control over the thoughts that we receive in our head, but we do have control over which ones to listen to. Not giving attention to a thought is similar to changing the radio station, whereas giving attention to a thought is similar to remaining on a radio station.

Just as we have zero control over being able to stop thoughts from popping into our head, we have zero control over which thoughts pop into our head.

An even more important distinction to recognize is that we have complete control over which thoughts we choose to believe.

To play devil’s advocate to what I just said, for those who believe in fate, it can even be argued that we don’t even choose our thoughts. Who told us to choose a certain thought? To believe a certain thought? It can be said that it’s part of our destiny and that the script is already written and we’re just playing it out.

It’s estimated that we have 60,000 – 100,000 thoughts swirl around in our head on any given day. Most of these thoughts are regurgitated and go unnoticed, none of these thoughts were placed in our head by choice, wrap your head around that.

Do We Have The Power To Create A Positive Thought?

If I presented you a blue ball in my hand and told you to choose the red one, could you do it?

Similarly, if you were presented with a negative thought and I told you to choose the positive one, could you do it?

Why is it that when we need an empowering thought the most it doesn’t seem to come? If we had the power to create one then we surely would. Instead, we wait until one pops into our head. And, if we’re too distracted or overwhelmed, we’ll completely miss the thought altogether.

Since I’ve pointed to the understanding we don’t create our thinking, this also points towards the understanding that we can’t create a positive thought. We can choose one, but we cannot create one.

If you’ve never made a million dollars before and I asked you to create a thought that will tell you how to make 1 million dollars in 1 week, could you do it? Why not?

I think this is where the distinction between choosing a thought and creating a thought really needs to be distinguished.

Here’s an example I received recently:

“At any time, I can recognize I am being hard on myself and then consciously choose to think, “I deserve a little credit for everything I did right today.” That’s an example of consciously choosing to create an empowering thought, and I’ve actually done this many times!”

I can see many people being confused by this, as it confused the heck out of me at one point as well.

Who placed the thought “I deserve a little credit for everything I did right today.” into their head?

Where did that thought come from? Once again, this remains a mystery.

This person chose to give that thought attention and bring it to life with belief, but only after the thought was created and delivered as an option in the mind’s eye. If we had the power to consciously create “positive” and empowering thoughts then we would do it all the time, but I’m sure based on experience, we can all agree that this is just not true.

As fascinating as the mind is, it is limited to only one thought at a time. One thought that we didn’t create but the one thought that we chose.

I understand that this is a hard concept to grasp, and one that can completely rock your world. Especially for those who want to think they’re in control, it can be earth shattering to even fathom the idea that you’re not in control of which thoughts get created and place into your head. That all you have control of is which thoughts you choose to give attention.

The opposite to control is freedom, free from the need or desire to control. This is when we will experience true freedom of mind.

Where Is Freedom Of Mind?

There’s no freedom in condemnation. Freedom lay not with judgement but with non-judgement. A mind that condemns a thought due to a negative judgement is not a free mind.

This is a mind that is on edge, constantly on the lookout for the enemy. A mind that fears harm upon itself is not a free mind, this is a paranoid mind.

A liberated mind does not judge itself; it accepts what arises and understands that it does not need to attempt to control the uncontrollable.

True freedom of mind lay not without certain thoughts but with all thoughts. True freedom of mind lay not with fear of certain thoughts but with love for all thought.

The Repercussions Of Always Trying To Think Positive

Firstly, if your expectation is that you should always think positive then you will be thoroughly disappointed. You’re setting yourself up for failure, this is one battle you will never, ever win.

Your frustrations during this battle will generate their own negative thoughts by way of continuous judgement of yourself for not gaining control. This will ultimately lead to the creation of an ongoing teeter-totter between positive and negative thinking.

This constant battle is exhausting, it takes up so much mental energy. This is wasted energy that could arguably be better spent on creativity or imagination, among other things.

A More Peaceful Approach To Our Thoughts And Emotions

Typically, negative thoughts are judged as negative due to the feeling they induce. Common feelings such as anger, guilt, frustration and resentment are regularly judged as negative emotions leading us to believe that our thinking is negative.

What if there is no such thing as a negative thought?

I like to view our emotions as indicators sending us messages. An innocent indicator that points us toward our thinking that has led to that emotion. Not to judge the thoughts, but to see the innocence and harmlessness in the thoughts, and to see the thoughts with compassion.

Feelings are a barometer of our thoughts at any given time

– George Pransky, The Relationship Handbook

The messages we receive are always a reflection of our thoughts at the moment since each one of our thoughts gives birth to a corresponding emotion. Therefore, the benefit of any thought, whether we judge it as positive or negative, is that it will generate a feeling which we can use to better understand our thinking at the moment.

If you pay attention to your feelings without judgement, you’ll see that they’re a great indicator to which thoughts you’re giving the most attention.

In my experience, see our thoughts with understanding and compassion are a much more peaceful approach than constantly judging.

Generate Clarity With Just 2 Powerful Questions

Rather than constantly judging our thinking, I propose a much more peaceful and non-judgmental way to explore our thoughts. There are two powerful questions I like to ask myself that help me see with more clarity, they are:

  1. Is this thought really true?
  2. Does this thought serve the greater good?

Learn from all of your experiences, opportunities are everywhere.

Take care,

Rob Kish

This is a slightly modified version of the popular original that was published on PickTheBrain: https://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/why-positive-thinking-doesnt-work-and-what-does/

Ask Yourself This To See If You’re Truly Happy

Ask Yourself This To See If You’re Truly Happy

If your most cherished material possessions were taken away from you, would you still be truly and infinitely happy?

This question humbles me personally, it reminds me that I have yet to own my happiness regardless of what is happening in the outside world and that I’m an infinite student of living from the inside-out.

It’s hard to fathom a world without our most cherished material possessions. I have a difficult time imagining my life without them. Would I still be happy? At first, I don’t think I would. I do have full confidence that I would find inner happiness though.

What I like about this question is how it directs us inward for happiness. To look in the opposite direction of the material world that we have become so reliant upon for chasing our happiness. Gaining happiness from material things is always temporary, keeping us on the search either until we die or until we wake up.

Instead of trying to learn how to be happy, try unlearning your current formula for happiness and you will discover true happiness. Happiness isn’t acquired through the sum of some formula, happiness is acquired through the realization that we have all we need at this moment and not a drop less.

 

Learn from all of your experiences, opportunities are everywhere.

Take care,

Rob Kish

Ever Seen Your Problems As A Mack Truck Coming At You? Read This

Ever Seen Your Problems As A Mack Truck Coming At You? Read This

During a recent conversation with a client, they metaphorically told me they saw their most recent struggles as a mack truck coming at them. That’s some pretty serious shit. It’s no wonder they’ve been making poor decisions out of panic, they see a Mack Truck coming at them, leaving them one of two choices…live or die!

This thought will immediately initiate our fight or flight signals in the brain, telling our bodies to pump out adrenaline like it’s their only job. Seemingly presenting two panic-filled choices, stand in the way and get killed or jump out of the way and live to see another day.

What if there is a third option?

Here is the metaphor I then presented to them. (and yes, I made it up on the spot)

Imagine this…

You are standing in the middle of a long deserted road, in the middle of nowhere. No humanity in sight. Just you and the long empty road ahead.

All of a sudden, appearing right in front of you out of nowhere, you see this giant Mack Truck coming straight at you. At this point, you may as well be wearing horse guides since you don’t acknowledge anything to the left or right of you.

You are now completely blinded by the sight of this Mack Truck coming straight at you, unable to see past it. You are also oblivious to what is behind it.

You’re looking straight into the headlights of this giant Mack Truck. You notice the truck is carrying very familiar cargo. The cargo looks something like this:

  • A to-do list longer than your Christmas list when you were a kid
  • Tax deadlines
  • Bill deadlines
  • School deadlines
  • Paperwork for an upcoming job
  • Tasks you procrastinated for weeks and months
  • Grieving a loss
  • Haunting thoughts about the past
  • Crippling thoughts about the future
  • Anything else you may see as a problem leading to your stress

Now, it appears you have two choices right?

Move out of the way immediately. This represents you dropping nearly all other priorities in life such as sleep, working out, good nutrition, health, family, ME time, and any other aspects of your life that are highly valuable, in order to eliminate these problems.

Leading you to wonder…“how do I complete all these tasks so I can stop seeing this Mack Truck coming at me?”

Or…

You don’t move out of the way and get hit by the Mack Truck (not fun I imagine).

What if…

You wake up and realize that there is no Mack Truck?

That is was all in your head?

That you made the whole thing up?

And when you do wake up to realize this, you notice there is the most beautiful horizon that was hidden beyond the sight of the Mack Truck the entire time. This horizon represents the ultimate beauty of life that is available to see any time you want.

Just in front of the horizon, you notice the road splits into 10 different paths you could take. Each path presenting a different option for you, now giving you 10 choices instead of the 2 that you had when the Mack Truck was in front of you.

Leading you to now wonder…“how can I maintain sight of the beauty of life while completing these tasks?”

 

Learn from all of your experiences, opportunities are everywhere.

Take care,

Rob Kish

Absurd Ironies We Live By

Absurd Ironies We Live By

Our lives are chock-full of illogical idiosyncrasies. Most of us lead lives of confusion and complexity mainly because we over-complicate the simple, and reverse the straightforward.

Here are some absurd ironies we all live by or have lived by at one time or another. Feel free to add your own to the list in the comments below. I’d love to hear what you can come up with 🙂

Enjoy!

Absurd Ironies We Live By:

We fear death yet don’t live like we’re going to die

We mourn death yet don’t celebrate life while it’s happening

We live in the past and wonder why we’re depressed

We live in the future and wonder why we’re anxious

We’re brave to hold up a mirror for others yet fear to look in our own

We spend 1/3 of our day at a job we don’t like and wonder why we aren’t happy

We try to avoid feeling certain emotions and wonder why we feel numb

We neglect to give ourselves love and wonder why we feel nobody loves us

We don’t take care of our bodies and wonder why our bodies break down

We retire from a job we never loved only to realize we wouldn’t have retired if we loved our job

We wait for others to make the first move yet it everyone thought like that there would be nothing to wait for

We believe in Karma yet live like we’re immune to it

We believe in material things yet don’t believe in ourselves

We constantly look for shortcuts and then wonder where the beauty in the journey is

We think we’re separate yet all of our hearts are told to beat by one

We search for our answers outside of us yet we have an infinite well of wisdom within us

We’re quick to judge others yet seldom look in the mirror

We’re always focused on what to do and then wonder why we aren’t who we want to be

We feed ourselves with man-made food and wonder why we have so many man-made diseases

We degrade our health to make money then spend that money on our degrading health

We trust the egos of other people yet don’t trust our own intuition

We hold grudges thinking we’re handing off our pain to the other person yet we’re the only one feeling the pain

We have most of our conversations through messaging and wonder why we don’t feel connected

We’re in a rush to get everywhere and wonder why we feel like we’ve gotten nowhere

 

 

Learn from all of your experiences, opportunities are everywhere.

Take care,

Rob Kish

Be Aware Of What You Bring Home Before It Becomes Your Home

Be Aware Of What You Bring Home Before It Becomes Your Home

How do you currently view your home? What does your home represent to you? A sanctuary? A war zone? A workplace?  A retreat? A warm welcome? A stress inducer? Would you like to change how you view your home?

We need to be very, very careful with what we bring into our homes, mentally and physically. These two factors will determine what your home represents to you.

Bringing Emotions Home

Maybe you had it out with your boss or co-worker Maybe you had your vacation denied or were told you “had” to work this coming weekend. Maybe you got into a fight with your spouse. Whatever the reason is, for your own sake and the sake of anyone you live with, don’t bring those emotions from those events into your home if at all possible.

Unless you’re one of the few people who has a room in their home dedicated to meditation, thought processing, or some form of mental or spiritual retreat, find time and space outside of your home to be with your thoughts and emotions. (If you don’t currently have a designated space in your home for this then it would be a great idea to see where you can implement one.)

Our homes are littered with distractions, kids, spouses, television, smartphones, iPads/Tablets, computers/laptops etc. All of them are a one-way ticket to the hazardous destination that arrives when we ignore our emotions.

This is when we lash out at our kids, pets, spouses, or anyone else who happens to be standing in front of us. So help them as they reap the wrath of our emotions.

Before long, we no longer look forward to coming home. We blame our kids and/or spouses for what we don’t want to come home to, yet take no responsibility for the distorted vision we bring home.

What tends to work for many people is spending whatever time they need (5-10min) in their cars to sit with their emotions, without distraction. Once you feel them, they will pass. This allows you to become more conscious of the thoughts and emotions you are bringing into your home.

You may do this by taking a longer, more scenic route home, or sitting in a parking lot somewhere.

For more insight on making this time effective I recommend you read my post of How To Quiet Your Mind With Meditation or Techniques after you read this one. You can then apply what you learn there to your quiet time.

Physically Bringing Work Home

With people working more and more hours, it is not uncommon for work to be brought home. Most people anxiously await the first opportunity to bring work home just to get out of the office. However, this can be a really, really bad idea. Let me explain why.

The more we perform a certain action within a specific environment, the more we associate our environment with that action. If that action is one you would not like to associate with your home, DO NOT bring it home.

If the environment that you normally perform that action within is not the desired representation you want of your home then do not bring that action home.

For most people, the action is work-related and the undesired environment is work-related. Voila, you now view your home as a workplace or an office.

Working From Home

If your job allows you to work remotely from home for any amount of time, or you work from home full time, it is in your best interest to ensure you have a designated room for your office.

To avoid viewing the rest of your home outside of your office as a work environment (and any emotions associated with work) keep your work inside the office. Do not make exceptions to this rule by sometimes sitting down at the breakfast bar with your laptop and a cup of coffee first thing in the morning.

Before long you will look at your breakfast bar as a place of work rather than a potential place of peace with a cup of coffee, to reflect on yesterday’s wins and learning experiences.

Change Your View And What You See Changes

Your home is whatever you want it to be. After all, fundamentally it’s just a bunch of bricks mended together on top of a framework that gives us a sturdy foundation, electricity, and running water.

Any meaning that is given to your home beyond the materials it is made of is solely created by you. Even the purpose of your home is thought created, by you.

Change your view of your home and what you see of your home will change.

If you want your home to be a safe resting place, start creating that.

If you want your home to be full of love and peace, start creating that.

If you want your home to be a retreat from work, start creating that.

Whatever you want your home to represent to you, start creating it.

If you’re struggling with ideas on how to recreate your home environment then please share your story in the comment section and let’s come up with some ideas on how to make that happen for you.

Treat your home how you want to see your home

Learn from all of your experiences, opportunities are everywhere.

Take care,

Rob Kish

2 Shockingly Simple Questions That Will Help You Make Better Decisions

2 Shockingly Simple Questions That Will Help You Make Better Decisions

How would you like to be able to make better decisions just by asking yourself 2 shockingly simple questions? These 2 questions will have the power to rock your beliefs, shift your perspective immediately, and create clarity before you make a decision that could lead to a costly mistake.

Don’t let their simplicity fool you, make sure you read the backstory to each question to understand why they are so powerful and how to use them effectively.

Undesired Feelings Lead to Undesired Actions

I use these 2 questions on a daily basis any time I have a thought in my head that is creating undesired feelings or I want more clarity with my thoughts. Being aware that our actions are largely driven by emotion, I ask these 2 questions to ensure I don’t make decisions that I might later regret.

You can ask the 2 questions any time, but where they really shine is when you’re experiencing dilemma or undesired emotions. They will provide you with a source of emotional intelligence that has been previously untapped.

Objective: Separate Thought from Reality

Reality is defined as what actually happened or is happening without our thoughts attached to it.

A thought is defined as the meaning we give or the opinion we have on what has happened or is happening.

When you’re truly able to see that your entire experience of life is based on a thought created reality, and not reality itself, you will experience true freedom.

Let’s get to it, shall we?

Question #1: Is it really true?

I first came across this question through the work of Byron Katie, in her life-changing books of profound simplicity. The 2 books of hers that I read are A Mind at Home with Itself: How Asking Four Questions Can Free Your Mind, Open Your Heart and Turn Your World Around and Loving What Is: Four Questions That Can Change Your Life.

What I love about this question is how it helps us separate our thoughts from reality. Or in more general terms, see through our made up bull shit.

Example

Say someone you love in your life didn’t wish you Happy Birthday on the day of your Birthday, what does this mean? You may have thoughts such as “they don’t love me” “I’m obviously not important to them” etc.

Now you can ask this question to separate reality from your thoughts.

The thought – “They don’t love me”…Is it really true? No (it’s your opinion, and an opinion you don’t have to believe)

The reality – They didn’t say Happy Birthday. (that’s it, nothing more, any additions to this reality are thought created illusions)

Initially, you will notice A LOT of resistance toward letting go of the thought that is purely opinion based and separate from reality. This is normal. Merely asking the question “is it really true?” will plant a seed of doubt on its’ own.

After asking this question, if you sit with the thought long enough, you will start to notice that the chokehold it has on you will start to loosen and you will notice fresh new thoughts starting to breathe through.

This is all you need, a crack in the foundation, the next question will crumble it.

Question #2: Does/Will believing this thought serve the greater good?

You must first understand that the answer to this question must come from you, not your ego. Your ego will want to preserve itself as all it cares about is itself, nobody else. If the thought in your head only serves you and nobody else then you can bet it is ego based.

Using the example from above:

The thought – “They don’t love me”…Does/Will it serve the greater good?

Let’s look at both sides

Yes, believing this thought will serve the greater good.

What are the actions that you might take if you believe this thought will serve the greater good?

  • Ignore this person
  • Neglect to wish them Happy Birthday when theirs comes
  • Voice your dismay to your friends and family, possibly creating conflict
  • Treat this person with resentment

Is it a pleasant feeling that you carry inside when you resent another?

How do you treat others when you have resentment inside you?

Do these actions serve you being your best self?

Do these actions serve others?

If you’re being truthful, the answer to all of those will be a resounding no.

No, believing this thought won’t serve the greater good.

What are the actions that you might take if you don’t believe this thought will serve you or the greater good?

  • Reach out to them from a place of concern to make sure they’re OK because it is unusual for them to not say Happy Birthday
  • Wait non-judgingly until the next day, maybe something happened, such as their phone or internet being cut off

Try it and let me know how it goes!

I would love to hear your experience with applying these 2 questions to your thoughts. Share your experience or ask any questions you may have in the comments below!

Learn from all of your experiences, opportunities are everywhere.

Take care,

Rob Kish

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